Recently I had a couple that I had matched get together and claim to have instant chemistry.

They met at a dog park and he said the instant she got out of the car he was smitten.

They spent the afternoon together with their dogs and then went on to a restaurant and talked for hours.

For them this worked.

When coming to Misty River Introductions, each new client is usually looking for something different to satisfy their relationship needs.

Some people want marriage no matter what age and stage they are at. Many of the people in their 70’s and 80’s are just looking for companionship without living together. So, they essentially want someone to travel with, have dinners out with and maybe attend theatre or sporting events with.

I’m always a bit surprised when people say “I WOULD NEVER PAY TO FIND A RELATIONSHIP” or “I DON’T HAVE TO PAY TO FIND A MAN.” Those people fixate on the putting out of money and not what they are getting for the money. Our clients see the service being provided and the value of that service. It is an investment however isn’t your relationship/partner something worth investing in?

When you join Misty River Introductions you know the people you are meeting have also invested the same amount. Both the men and women are spending their hard-earned money to join. What you can’t take away from that is that everyone is on an even playing field and they are serious about the process.

These days there is such an emphasis on finding a balance between work and home life. Personally, I think the key to finding that balance is approaching them the same way. Giving them the same weight and respect. WORK IS SERIOUS and YOU WORK AT IT. HOME LIFE/RELATIONSHIPS just sort of happen.

I met with a woman the other day who, at the end of our meeting, she was still unsure about joining the service. This is someone who had researched us, shopped around, visited our website and contacted the office on more than one occasion before ultimately arranging an interview with me. The interest was clearly there. When I asked her the reason for her reluctance, it wasn’t the cost, or the commitment or anything to do with “really being ready for a relationship” that was holding her back. Instead she said, “I just don’t believe “He’s” out there”.

When I first started my career as a matchmaker, I did a lot of work in northern Manitoba, Ontario and Saskatchewan. The problem with working with people living in those secluded areas, is generally men move up north for work in greater numbers than women which creates a gender imbalance. This can make finding the right matches more difficult.

A common mistake I deal with when people are looking to be matched is finding someone who makes everyone else happy before themselves. I always tell everyone they need to look out for themselves. It is their life and finding their perfect match is what should be most important. The rest will figure itself out.

I remember a woman recently telling me that her husband was 6’4” and her sons were 6’4”. She proclaimed that she could not see herself dating anyone shorter than that.

I recently had a widow come to me and say, “I know you’ll never find anyone like my husband.” She had been married to a very accomplished, handsome loving man. I knew from the beginning finding her a match was a very tall order.

I told her the same thing that I’ve told many widowers who have used us with success, “It is possible to meet someone who is just as wonderful as what you’ve had. You just need to be open to the possibilities.”

One of the first matches, at the beginning of my career, was for a very handsome man who had worked for the railway. He went into the post office and dropped off his application. 25 years ago, this was the norm, most of our correspondence was done that way.

I think the postmistress must have been quite impressed because immediately after that her daughter signed up with us, which is how she met her husband.

One of the interesting things about being a matchmaker is that people come to me and say, “I’m really bad at choosing people. The last three relationships I was in, the person treated me very badly. They were verbally abusive and belittling, definitely not the best foundation for a positive, long-lasting relationship.” That’s great to say but in order to find that special someone, you need to change your thinking. I can match you up as much as you want but ultimately, you’re the only one who can choose who you end up with.

Single men frequently come to me to guide them through best practices to ace their upcoming first date with the hopes of getting a second.

The first step in our dating process should come at no surprise… we send all our clients a brief overview of who they are going to be meeting. We always recommend reading through it to learn more about your date’s interests. Armed with this information, you are now ready to bring up different topics of conversation that will keep your date engaged. It is important to remember not to monologue, let her lead you away from that if that’s where it looks like you are heading. Most importantly let her talk/lead the conversation after you have asked your initial question. Not every silence has to be filled with you talking or telling her about yourself. Letting a silence linger for more than a few seconds allows her to ask questions or tell you about yourself.

The longer I’ve worked as a matchmaker the more stories I have about people looking for love.

I was in a dress shop in Toronto with a friend 6 months ago. While I was on the phone I noticed a woman who looked vaguely familiar looking at me. When I got off the phone, she asked me “are you Linda Miller, the matchmaker who owns Misty River Introductions.” As soon as she started talking, I instantly knew who she was.

I often get people who corner me at parties and ask me if people have ever gotten married after meeting using our service. The answer is… of course! Thousands of people have met and married through using different matchmaking services.

The thing about using a matchmaking service is that in our busy complicated lives we often don’t have time to actively look for single people who meet our strict criteria. Sometimes people come to me who have been married for decades and lose a spouse or young people who are too busy working on a career and find themselves closing in on thirty with the dreams of starting a family seeming almost unattainable. What a matchmaker does is become an advocate for you. A good matchmaker is like having a best friend/confident every step of the way on your journey to find love.

In my 25 years as a professional matchmaker, the biggest mistake I see repeatedly is over thinking. I get clients that become absolutely paralyzed trying to decide whether to go on a date or not. They dissect every aspect of the match from personality and hobbies to lifestyle and education. I guarantee that there is no way of knowing who you are going to end up with, just by reading some information provided in a profile. I can however tell you with 100% certainty that you will remain single if you don’t take that leap of faith and go on a date. Waiting for “the one” to appear in profile form is never going to happen. People are a sum of many things and it is impossible to translate that to a piece of paper.

Having spent the last 25 years of my life matching people with their life partners, I can usually tell right away if someone is going to be successfully matched.

Recently one of my colleagues and I met a woman who had met someone through our service and was quite happy. Even though she had initially done a phone interview when she joined, she wondered if she could meet Nancy and I in person. So, we planned to meet her in the Lobby of a downtown Toronto hotel.

These days we’re all extremely aware of stranger danger. Including all the pitfalls of meeting someone you don’t know on a blind date. Men will often ask me how they can approach someone with out looking creepy and predatory.

As a professional matchmaker I have some guidelines I tell everyone to follow to keep it light and moving in the right direction.

Over the years as a professional matchmaker I have come to realize what makes a first date successful. I have compiled a simple and easy list for you to follow and keep in mind when preparing for your next first date.

So many people have described modern day dating through the exhausting and fruitless attempts made at finding a real relationship through tinder and bumble like apps.

The problem with these apps are you are relying too heavily on just a photo to help you choose someone with the hopes they will be a lifelong partner.

One of the things that makes dating so hard these days is that we often have first date fatigue caused by the rigours of online dating.

Hiring a matchmaker can make it a more productive experience with less awkward dates that feel more like work than fun and more dates with people that are much closer to what you’re really looking for.

People want that indescribable chemistry that causes you to look at someone and feel your heart skip a beat. Having shared interests, goals and values is important, but finding that attraction that makes you keep trying even when everything else is going wrong, is extremely important.